If you have been around a teen for more than an hour you will start to realize teens make decisions in the world differently than adults. Many parents have wondered if their teen is thinking at all sometimes. What research shows is that your teen is thinking, but just with different parts of their brain. A teens brain with not be fully developed until they are into their 20’s.  Researchers have found that those seemingly wild teen decisions may serve more purpose than just to drive you crazy. Since the teen brain has not fully developed yet it allows teens to explore, tryout, and take risks in the world in a different way than an adult might. So, why is this important you may ask, because it gives teens the inspiration to seek out new experiences and thrills which ultimately help them move out into the world and off of your couch.

Surprisingly, researchers found that teens and adult usually think through problems the same way and teens even think risks are greater than they really are. Then why is it that a teen makes a decision that perplexes you as an adult? Many parents have experienced this, maybe your teen says they plan to work hard this year in school by completing all assignments on time and maybe even start tutoring because they want to get into a specific college but a few weeks later you receive a note from the school saying the teen skipped a class. The teen seemed to be thinking logically about how to solve their problem but what happened? Research shows when a risk can get the teen something they want they care more about the reward than the cost. So, the teen cares more about the reward of hanging out with some new friends than the cost of a bad grade and consequences at school.

So here are some take away for parenting teens:

• Teens still need guidance and help thinking through their decisions while having the freedom to make mistakes that are not harmful to themselves or others.
• Try to understand why your teen made the decision they chose before you set consequences and limits.
• Encourage your teen’s positive decisions and talk with them about how the decided to make those decisions.
• Keep the goal in mind: Your main job in parenting teens is to prepare them to launch out into the world and be a productive member of society.

Research information taken from National Geography October Issues Magazine article Beautiful Brains by David Dobbs.

Full article found here: http://ngm.nationalgeographic.com/2011/10/teenage-brains/dobbs-text

Jennifer Wilmoth, LAMFT
jwilmoth@GROWcounseling.com