This is the final part of a 4 part series. Read the 3rd HERE

Have a signal for a time-out and know when to use it.

Good coaches know when to call a time out that will be helpful for a team.  Couples can learn this technique too.  Often with complex issues (aka red, hot, burning fire topics) the conversation needs to be broken down into manageable chunks of time.  To do this, you have to have a way to place boundaries and set time limits with the dialogue.  A time-out can allow each person a sense of control in the pacing the conversation.  Create a time-out signal together and agree to use it when discussing the hot topics.  This is a good way to create space in your relationship to honor one another by stepping away for a time. Agree upon a time to reconnect with the possibility of continuing the conversation.

Adapted from The Power of the Middle Ground, Marty Babit

Marlayne Whitlock, LAPC
MWhitlock@ GROWCounseling.com