photo: US Department of Education, Creative Commons

“School is right around the corner and my kid is freaking out. How can I be helpful to him, while not freaking myself out scrambling to get everything ready for them?”

The summer months tend to be a time of excitement, vacations, and lots of quality family time. Inevitably though, at the end of every summer I have a number of clients wrestling with how to help their children readjust back into the routines of their academic year. Be assured that it’s completely normal for kids, and parents, to have some anxieties or other difficulties as they head back to school.

Here are a couple of thoughts parents have found to be extremely helpful during the back to school transition:

• Take time to focus your undivided attention on your child. Sit on the floor with them and genuinely show some curiosity about what their thoughts and feelings are around going back to school. What are their expectations? What will their days look like – schedules, classes, bus rides, lunch breaks, bathroom breaks, etc? Are there any bullies? For kids who go off their medications for the summer months, what will it be like for them to start back on them?
• Good time management is crucial. While you’re sitting on the floor with your kid jot down some notes of what their needs are – school supplies, clothes, haircuts, etc… and figure out a manageable way to work that into your schedule. Include your children in accomplishing this list – brainstorming times, places to shop, etc. Make it something fun, like a date of sorts. Kids love to go on dates with their parents!
• Spend some time reminding your child that you’ll be getting back into daily routines, like meals, bedtimes, etc. because transitioning back into that structure in and of itself can be chaotic.
• Extend yourself some grace. There’s a lot of preparation parents have to do.  But remember, you don’t have to have absolutely everything done by the first day of school!

For athletes & celebrities this transition often brings with it numerous other complications due to their professional requirements. While you’re sitting on the floor being curious with your kids, let them know what it’s going to be like for you to transition back into your career. Let them know what your involvement with them and their schooling is going to look like. Be sure to encourage your child that you’re not going to forget about them. Schedule some specific time to Skype or call them. These little things go a long way in creating secure attachments for children when their parents have to be away.

Nick Hersey, LAMFT, LAPC

nhersey@ GROWcounseling.com