This is a series of blogs that Jennifer Wilmoth, LAMFT wrote after returning from a recent trip to Africa. A few reflections, a few lessons learned. Enjoy the journey. 

Stories from Africa: Chapter 6
Fear of what?

As we entered the gates of Kibera with military escorts armed with machine guns; I thought to myself what would happen if the military officers were not with us. I later spoke with the officers about the violence in Kibera, partly to answer my question and partly to understand the environment and violence the children in Kibera face. The officers looked shocked when I asked about entering Kibera without escorts- they explained to me the group would likely be robbed and the women raped. They went on to tell of crimes and violence that happen nightly and regularly in the slum. I left my conversation with the officers understanding more of the hardship and difficulties the people in the slum experience and how they survive.  I thought about how fearful they must be walking home from school and at night when the only safety they have from the violence in the corridors is their make- shift homes.

Later that day we had the opportunity to visit the home of a student.  We left the school and walked by mounds of trash in the street and arrived at tin structure. We made our way down a dark narrow corridor and entered into the home of the student which was no larger than an American SUV. I noticed the walls were made out of cardboard and tin which seemed to offer little protection from weather or crime. The only things that occupied the space were mattresses and a table made from two water buckets and a board. It seemed the only privacy they had was a sheet that hung from the ceiling to separate the mattresses from the rest of the space. The student’s grandmother was there to greet us and welcome us to her home with the help of a translator. Out of curiosity, the group asked many questions about life in the slum and about their home. As I still had questions swirling around in my head from my talk with the military officers I asked, “What are you afraid of?” She quickly answered, “Nothing”. Her answer intrigued me. After all I had heard from the officers and seen I could think of a list of things I would be concerned or afraid of living in a slum like Kibera. As we left the student’s home I thought more about her answer. Was it that the crimes and violence of the slum were familiar to her? Was she just emotionally numb from her own experiences? Was it her religious beliefs? I looked for other signs of fear from children and people in the slum and I found very little. One of the only fears talked about was a fear of hearing “bad news”. They explained, this is a fear of a loved one dying or being hurt.

The idea of having no fear or only fearing the loss of loved one in an environment like the slum leaves me with more questions than answers. It does bring to mind the list of fears and worries people in America seem to have and it makes me wonder if the emotion of fear is talked about and experienced differently around the world?

Jennifer Wilmoth, LAMFT
JWilmoth@ GROWcounseling.com