As of now all of my children are adults. I’ve come to learn and appreciate them for their wisdom and understanding at what seems to me to be young ages. I say young only because of the number of years between us. To see them maturing into the persons they are does my heart good to know that I had something to do with the knowledge they express when we have discussions about important topics such as finances, relationships, their future, etc. Over the last few years I’ve heard them voice in so many ways thoughts about what life is like for them. It seems a short time ago when I’d hear them just as children concerned with kids’ concerns.

Appreciating our children when they begin discussing the person they’re considering to marry, which I’ve had the enjoyment to do with both of my boys, and now discussing that idea with my daughter about the guy she’s “just dating,” whatever that really means, brings home the idea of what opportunities I’ve had over the years to be a part of my children’s lives. To know that they’re beginning families of their own brings to light even greater discussions, hopefully, of what adulthood really means for them.

Seeing how each one has assumed the responsibilities of adulthood helps me as I counsel with people. To understand a little better the different points of view which are expressed in the counseling office and where some of those beliefs come from. When adult parents start understanding the ways in which their adult children react to certain words or phrases it can help the relationship become  that much better. Froma Walsh in her book “Strengthening Family Resilience” states that “good communication is vital to family functioning and resilience.” There can always be clearer communication and deeper understanding between parents and children, parents appreciating their adult children for the wisdom they have can assist the relationship in those areas.