Do you have a friend that seems to do everything right the first time? He can fix a car, a plastic toy that his kid broke, program iPhone games in his sleep, and play just about every instrument possible? Perhaps your friend is also an excellent husband who is always encouraging to his wife and an excellent father of a whole brood of children. How does he do it? How does he not only excel at his job, extra-curricular activities, and have an awesome family to boot?

I have had many conversations with this individual and he said that he takes a lot of risks. The risks are not as fancy as skydiving or bungee jumping but everyday risks of how to talk to his kids and discipline them. He tries to do his best to think through the risk before he does it. Most recently he worked on his car’s engine for the first time ever and fixed a problem that would have cost him $900.00 if he would have taken it to a mechanic, for $50.00 and an hour of his time. When it comes to his family, he thinks about what he wants his children to be, and not what they are.  I am reminded of a quote by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, “If you treat an individual as he is, he will remain how he is. But if you treat him as if he were what he ought to be and could be, he will become what he ought to be and could be.” My friend said that this was how he wanted to raise his kids. He said that he also treats his marriage the same way. True, his marriage is not perfect, but at the end of the day, he wants it to be, so he treats it as if the marriage is capable of being perfect. He is not afraid to admit that he makes mistakes, and he takes these mistakes to heart and learns from them.

So, I will end with another quote from Von Goethe, “By seeking and blundering we learn.” Are you willing to take a risk to better yourself? Are you willing to learn and grow? Don’t be afraid to make a mistake. If you fail, you will know what not to do next time. I hope my friend encourages you to take a risk in your job, with your spouse or significant other, with your friends, or maybe trying out a new hobby.  Who knows, you might surprise yourself with what you are capable of doing.

Adam Glendye, MA – Aglendye@ growcounseling.com