In an article in Psychology Today, White Collar men are reported to have a higher level of happiness than women. The publication also indicated that men are more likely to relax during the day and take specific time to take a break.
As a woman, what makes it so hard to take a break and enjoy having down time and relaxing?
Is it society’s expectation for women to be wives, mothers, and now breadwinners? In this blog, we are going to explore the “second shift” and the factors that can contribute to added stress and anxiety.
Women are traditionally known as the nurturers of the family. They are expected to take care of their kids as well as all of the demands that nurturing the family entails. On top of these duties is the second shift, commonly known as the responsibilities following work: cooking, cleaning, shuffling kids to and from school and extracurricular activities.
The demands of the second shift can be overwhelming towards women.
In an ideal world, the second shift should be divided 50/50 among partners. However, more often than not, the wife ends up with the bulk of the responsibility. In turn, this can take a toll on one’s marriage, and women end up feeling stressed and guilty about falling short of expectations.
The Forbes article, Should Overwhelmed Working Women ‘Take It Like A Mom’ Or Ask For Help, brings up a critical question. The question is what happens when you have nothing left to give? In this article, the working mother struggled to balance work and home life. She eventually became so overwhelmed by her responsibilities that she picked up her child from daycare and fled to her parents for the weekend. How many times have working and stay at home moms alike wanted a break or a time out?
According to this article, women are working nearly 11 hours more per week than they did in the 1970’s, but spending the same amount of time with their children as they did in the 1950’s. There are only 24 hours in a day and with the increase of women working full time, while simultaneously trying to manage the second shift, self-care as well as any form of relaxation gets cut out. As a result, resentments and frustrations can begin to develop. Often times, the children and the partners are the one’s that will receive the brunt of that frustration.
Check back next week for part two of this blog. In part two, we will explore society’s expectation for women to be “supermoms” as well as tips that you and your partner can use to combat this belief.
Chelsey Beauchamp, MS
cbeauchamp @ growcounseling.com