Because of the nature of sexual addiction, the impact on the partners is often deeply felt. There are many co-dependent features seen in treating partners of chemical addicts as there are in treating sex addicts. Codependency refers to a relationship in which one partner is psychologically attached in an unhealthy way to an addicted partner and/or that partner’s addictions. Addressing the hurt of a sex addict’s partner is often more complicated for many reasons, including: shame, embarrassment, jealousy, inadequacy, taking addiction personally, and feeling sexually insufficient.

In his book Healing The Wounds of Sexual Addiction Mark Laaser writes “Sexual addiction begins in families that possess unhealthy dynamics and characteristics. Since the addict’s partner usually personalizes the sexual addiction, they often express the feeling that they are permanently damaged or not good enough. If they have adopted these messages of insufficiency or worthlessness in childhood or adolescence from their own families, the acting out of the addicted partner can deepen any existing mental health issues.

Usually the treatment of partners and children of chemical addicts can also be applied to family members/partners of sex addicts. There are various groups for the partners and family members of sex addicts to attend, such as Codependents Anonymous (CODA). In addition, we have therapists at GROW Counseling who are trained to assist sex addicts and their families with the issues felt by this addiction.

Mark Ellison, LAMFT